To Lovers in the throes of misery Of course time IS the best healer. A change of scene also works wonders. If possible you need to get that person out of your face, out of your vision, out of your mind. See people and go places totally unconnected.
In your heart you know what behaviour is healthy and what is not. Do yourself a favour and make a conscious effort to do right by yourself. Being a martyr for love wont get you anywhere and any self-destructive tricks will make you feel worse.
Get your life in order and try out new things. Remember the things that interest you as an individual and pursue these activities. Do you enjoy dancing? writing? Painting? Model making? Music? Clay? Photography? A language? If you dont know.. try out something new… experiment, explore. Anything that expresses who you are. Learning a new skill will make you feel like a million dollars. Nurture and occupy your mind and soul. It is so healing and makes life more meaningful. Dont find excuses, find a way.
When you’re unlucky in love, remember there can be a dignity to your pain. You realise how strong you really are… and you grow a little wiser and a little more understanding, of yourself and of how other people work. You gain insights on the human condition. It will be a better person if you use these lessons wisely and with humility.
A broken heart is one of humanity’s most universal experiences, and there’s no shame in it. You are not alone, you are in the company of kings, geniuses, junkies, supermodels, beggars, Nobel prize winners and the common man. It IS very painful and its is hard to find hope and strength. But remember the world is full of good people, full of possibilities, full of people that could love you, if only you never give up, never, no matter what.
Perhaps the person you loved was special, but so are you and so are lots of people, you’re just so wrapped up in your desire, and needs and past issues probably, you think that person is the centre of the universe and you must have them. And although we must express the pain, it is beneficial to accept that on this occasion we can only love, grieve and let go. Allow this sadness in our lives, accept we cannot always have what we want. But sometimes we will, by accepting the loss we allow happiness to become a possibility. We must tell ourselves, “I am strong, I can do this, I can live without them, I can create a life with good energy.”
Maybe it seems like we are always on the receiving end of rejection and a breaking heart; Perhaps it’s because there is a lesson we need to learn in our lives before romantic love can enter our world. It doesn’t mean there is anything fundamentally wrong with you as a person. Look into yourself and meditate on what this lesson might be. It is a long road, hard and painful, but you can do it, you have strength and honour and dignity and you’re a survivor. The phoenix rises from the ashes, and so will also rise above this pain, bold, renewed and ready to try again.
